


In our sorrows we are the same.

by Theatrebaby88



Category: Spooks | MI-5
Genre: Multi, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-26
Updated: 2014-07-26
Packaged: 2018-02-10 13:29:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2026842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theatrebaby88/pseuds/Theatrebaby88
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ros knows what Jo must be feeling, her own recent experiences though different were a mix of feelings that she needs help to understand.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In our sorrows we are the same.

It was warm,sunny. A mild breeze gently moved the leaves and kept the heat pleasant.  Spring had begun and the people of London were out in force enjoying the sunshine. Student's sat upon Lions at Trafalgar square and splashed in the fountains before being told to move along by overly-warm  police officers. It was a carefree day for most but for two women it was anything but.

Ros Myers stood on the balcony far above the streets. She held a brown envelope in her hand as she took it from the trembling hand of her colleague. "Jo. Please just talk to me. I know what he did. What he put you through. I can't claim to understand what it's like for you but right now, you and I need each other."

Jo took a long draw from the cigarette that she held between her fingers then after a second inhaling she blew out a long stream of white smoke. "I don't even know what to say, Ros. How to even put it into words." She replied. "But in what way do we need each other?"  She then asked , flicking cigarette ash off the bars of the balcony.

Ros gave a half-hearted smile and sighed deeply before moving to stand along side the younger woman. "Because I need you to make me believe that I'm alright."

Jo looked concerned as she put out her cigarette. "Ros? What's happened? Last night when you went back to Alexis' hotel room? Was it that?"

Ros nodded. "Yes. He said to prove he could trust me, and so I did. By fucking him. I got home and I felt disgusted, ashamed and dirty. I showered straight away. I feel violated. I can remember the feel of him, how he sounded, and the taste of champagne on his breath as he lifted me and put me against the wall to begin." She confided in her colleague as she felt tears build. 

Jo listened. She let Ros speak, let her tell her of her own ordeal. She heard the confusion and pain in Ros' voice and saw the devastation on her face.  It was different, yes, but similar in ways that only they would understand.

"You were brave. You did what you had to do but he had no right to make you feel you had to. You gained his trust, in a sense and because of that you stopped the financial devastation of our country single handed." Jo told her, then though it was a rare show of affection for either woman, Jo gently put her arms around Ros and pulled her into a hug. "You're alright Ros, you are alright."

Ros returned the hug and brought her younger colleague to her, "Don't hold it in Jo..tell me what happened, let it out and tell me. I am horrified at what happened last night but that pales in comparison to having a stranger lay on top of me, forcing me on my back and giving me no choice but to have him violate my body. Jo you were raped, you killed a man, you remember so little of it because you are so traumatized by the ordeal. Do you remember what you asked Adam to do?"

Jo had gone silent, her grip on Ros tightened somewhat as everything was relayed to her, forcing up suppressed memories and skewed visions. Jo felt tears on her cheeks as the older woman told her all that had happened. "I..I can't.."

Ros exhaled and looked into Jo's eyes. "You asked him to kill you. To take you away from it."

Jo tried to suppress a sob but it still showed. "I'm sorry. I don't know anymore, Ros...everywhere I go, he's there. I can't sleep and when I wake up in the night I feel so afraid and I don't know why. I can't remember it, I can't remember any of it until I close my eyes...or I see a stranger in the street. And then just for a moment I'm back there and I feel..." Jo finally explained though tears, her words cut off at times by sobs and pauses to find the words. "I feel like I'm loosing my mind."

Ros let Jo cry, she held her and handed her a tissue to wipe her eyes. No one else would know about this, about what was said between the two, but Ros knew one thing, she would be alright, and when things seemed bad, she would think back to this moment and remember how bad it could have been, and be thankful it never got that far.

"You'll be alright, Jo...you will be alright."

 

 


End file.
